“Toxic Masculinity” is hyperreactive, hence why it is so devastating and rightfully demonised.
However this is to not be confused with “Mature Masculinity” which is grounded in a sense of self/ conviction, therefore a man having and holding boundaries. A man can reaffirm his boundaries, without aggression, without putting others in physical or emotional danger or on the other side of the pendulum, betray himself.
If anger shows up, the goal is to inquire which boundaries have been crossed, and reaffirm them – Not attack and belittle. Honour and appropriately place Anger. Don’t let it consume and be misplaced into Aggression.
A favourite quote from @traverboehm is “be Dangerous, not a Danger”
A few prompts on Anger
- My Relationship to Anger is…
- Anger shows up when…
- When I’m Angry, I…
- A way my Anger has effected my life is…
- My mother expressed her Anger by…
- My Father expressed his Anger by…